Comments on: Link Love

By: Dianne P

Dianne P — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 18:46:19 +0000

Your post at sojo hit a chord with me and I think that you have hit on a major issue out there for women in Christian community. I've been to those gatherings and I am so weary of this "us vs the world" talk. I just lost a long time friendship to this mindset. She came under the influence of a very opinionated survivor mentality – started forwarding me all sorts of emails about the evils that we're up against – the plots and plans of Obama and the homosexuals (did you know that "immorality… is so often pushed on students by liberal educators -often as early as kindergarten.)?" Her eyes had been opened and she wanted to open mine as well. I ignored the forwards for months, then finally asked her to not send me any more. Her response was explosive – and very telling of the insidious nature of this victim/ survivor mentality. Because I wouldn't continue to engage in that type of dialogue (if you can call it that), friendship over.

So my questions…
1. I think it would be helpful to share ways in which we could be lovingly responsive. I'm curious – what was your response during and after the tea? I tried and failed miserably. I don't mean to change anyone's mind – coexistence would be nice – though I guess that means that we do need to change minds. I want to say: I am already "aware" of this information and do not see it the same way that you do, and I do NOT want to live with an angry, defensive, paranoid heart, and I don't want to argue with anyone about it. I know there's plenty of evil in the world, but I want to continue to live in love and trust with one another – for me, to love my neighbor as myself means to give him/her the benefit of the doubt. I don't want to live my life with a survivor mentality.
2. My (former) friend said about the source of the email forwards: "Perhaps it's her boldness that I'm attracted to, as that's something I often find lacking in myself." As women, do we perceive ourselves as "not bold" and therefore are attracted to those who preach these things "boldly"?

By: Kim

Kim — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 15:05:16 +0000

Julie-thanks for your blog post at Sojourners. I'm a Jesus follower currently living in the South and resonate alot with what you felt during the presentation. I'll definitely be checking back and reading more of your older posts, thank you for your honest thoughts!

By: anhinga

anhinga — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 22:02:19 +0000

Thanks for stopping by to see my sky shot. We have so many trees that only a little patch of sky is visible, but the convergence was the right patch. I signed up for Blog Comment Day and have a ways to go, but I'll enjoy tonight. I will also be back to read more of your posts. Your blog looks very interesting. Thanks again for stopping by.

By: Liz

Liz — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 18:10:20 +0000

Julie – I just read your article "Questioning the ‘Survivor’ Mentality of Some Christians" over at God's Politics and wanted to say "YES!!!!!" and "Thank You!!" I am so tired of bible studies and events for women who are followers of Christ that promote such shallow self centeredness…and I too am a fan of Survivor the show and was also disappointed by the way that Leslie handled the welcoming ceremony and the way she came off as being a victim for being a "nice christian". I completely resonated with you when you said:

"I left the event wondering if this sort of message was really one the church needs to continue to hear. At what point do we move past the description of all that we are against and actually take an active stand for something? When do we stop just talking about religion and wishing others would be more like us and instead start doing the things Jesus asked us to do? If over a thousand women could devote an afternoon to high tea and hearing about how we should resist the culture, how awesome would it be if that many women instead took an afternoon to be the hands and feet of Jesus to this hurting world?"

Thanks for a great post.